The people on Facebook, and I believe there are no exceptions - can be put into categories - for sure, like -
1. EVENT MANAGERS: They are always interested in arranging/promoting almost every event, and not only that, but they want you to RSVP too..
"There is this reunion at my 4th grade school. I myself have never been to this place ever, have changed schools 7 times and can't even think of attending this. You hardly have heard of the school, but would you please attend it?" And you know what, most of them choose "Yes". And then it says, "ABC (who lives in the US) is attending XYZ school reunion, India."
2. THE STATUS UPDATER: These kind of people - no matter what they are doing - eating, drinking, puking or jumping from the top of a skyscraper, or even sleeping (with someone or without someone!) - they never forget to update their status. No wonder if they put:
"XYZ: is just being robbed (updated via Blackberry®)"..
You better call cops with that Blackberry of yours, you #$^$%!!
Sometimes they are too nimble:
10:19 PM: "My cat just pooped!"
10:21 PM: "Oh cat pooped again, I'm worried!"
10:23 PM: "Cat is not pooping. Is it normal?"
3. THE GAMER: Gamers seem like the most worthless and redundant people in the world! They have already tried each and every gaming application on Facebook, and they also select "Challenge Your Friend" after they finish. They play all sorts of games - witty, kiddish, boring, slow, quick, stupid - anything, be it game, that's it.
They also play FARMVILLE and MAFIA WARS, and when they do, you are notified,
"PQR has sent you 7 black sheep."
I want to accept the sheep and leave them into their own farms, and to buy a big bomb from the Mafia to blow up the crops and the fields.
4. THE (SENTI)MENTALS: I don't know which calendars they use, but everyday is some "blah" day for them. Their walls often say,
"....If you have or had a mother (WTF! Am I delivered by FedEx?), put this on your wall...."
They also keep track of every child in the country who is suffering from cancer and want you to pray for them. And for themselves, they just want to further update the statutes and wander through Facebook pages!
And they also don't forget the nice hearts at the end of the status!♥♥♥
5. THE ANNOUNCERS: They don't care how foolish or useless it seems - they announce almost everything. In a way, they are updaters, "X is in Chennai and has just missed the train." If you were not doing Facebook, you would have probably made it moron! Sometimes they say, "Awesome food! Thanks to ABC, PQR, MNO and XYZ for the treat." Wait, I was not there! or "XYZ is listening to 'Friday' by Rebecca Black. Awesome song!"!!
6. THE QUIZ TAKERS: This class often overlaps with 'The Gamers' class. They don't leave any stupid-ass quiz on Facebook named, "What kind of jerk are you?" (You are actually each possible kind of jerk!), "Who has a crush on you TODAY?" or "What will be your future wife's initials?". And their equally redundant friend comments, "Woah! These are not your current girlfriend's initials!"
7. THE TAGGERS: Taggers are the most bitched people. They put any random picture in their album and tag everyone they know (until the tag limit exceeds). Their "just fooling around" friends also manage to start an equally random chain of comments on the picture and you are notified on every comment.
Sometimes they are too nimble:
10:19 PM: "My cat just pooped!"
10:21 PM: "Oh cat pooped again, I'm worried!"
10:23 PM: "Cat is not pooping. Is it normal?"
3. THE GAMER: Gamers seem like the most worthless and redundant people in the world! They have already tried each and every gaming application on Facebook, and they also select "Challenge Your Friend" after they finish. They play all sorts of games - witty, kiddish, boring, slow, quick, stupid - anything, be it game, that's it.
They also play FARMVILLE and MAFIA WARS, and when they do, you are notified,
"PQR has sent you 7 black sheep."
I want to accept the sheep and leave them into their own farms, and to buy a big bomb from the Mafia to blow up the crops and the fields.
4. THE (SENTI)MENTALS: I don't know which calendars they use, but everyday is some "blah" day for them. Their walls often say,
"....If you have or had a mother (WTF! Am I delivered by FedEx?), put this on your wall...."
They also keep track of every child in the country who is suffering from cancer and want you to pray for them. And for themselves, they just want to further update the statutes and wander through Facebook pages!
And they also don't forget the nice hearts at the end of the status!♥♥♥
5. THE ANNOUNCERS: They don't care how foolish or useless it seems - they announce almost everything. In a way, they are updaters, "X is in Chennai and has just missed the train." If you were not doing Facebook, you would have probably made it moron! Sometimes they say, "Awesome food! Thanks to ABC, PQR, MNO and XYZ for the treat." Wait, I was not there! or "XYZ is listening to 'Friday' by Rebecca Black. Awesome song!"!!
6. THE QUIZ TAKERS: This class often overlaps with 'The Gamers' class. They don't leave any stupid-ass quiz on Facebook named, "What kind of jerk are you?" (You are actually each possible kind of jerk!), "Who has a crush on you TODAY?" or "What will be your future wife's initials?". And their equally redundant friend comments, "Woah! These are not your current girlfriend's initials!"
7. THE TAGGERS: Taggers are the most bitched people. They put any random picture in their album and tag everyone they know (until the tag limit exceeds). Their "just fooling around" friends also manage to start an equally random chain of comments on the picture and you are notified on every comment.
8. THE PERVS: These lewds always buy some spam-link accompanied by a thumbnail picture of a girl flashing, or a guy doing a girl, and "go to the links" promptly. You see their name in each and every post that is just "flooding" walls.
9. THE HUNTERS: They keep looking (and I don't know how they manage to) for the people having any remote connections with them, and send friends invite. Once, I got friends invite from a guy, because he and one of my cousin's friends went to the same school in 3rd grade!
10. THE WOMAN HUNTERS: Subset of (9), always, keep looking for girls on Facebook (actually everywhere). They keep flipping from one profile to another of their friends and as soon as they see a new girl, they don't fail to send her the invitation to be friends. And as soon as she (or may be "he") accepts the invite, they not only boast about, but also date her and get laid with her in their heads within next 5 minutes.
PS: Which kind am I? I am actually 11th kind: 11. THE NOTIFIERS: Who make observations and keep blabbing (or blogging), no matter any one wants to hear or not!
5 comments:
Nicely depicted the real kinds...
lol.. this is really funny.. and really true!
No mention of the kind hu keep expressing their love for weird machines :P
Lovely ! nice one ashish. Keep blabbing :P Btw I "superlike" this one ;)
AD: Observations! :)
Ritika: That would be just (7), had I put your name among the "Dussehra lights" ;)
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